We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us.

But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong.

Why is this?

Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way.

But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness.

And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems – the ones that make you truly who you are – that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate.

Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for.

You’re looking for the wrong person.

But not just any wrong person: it’s got to be the right wrong person – someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”

I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.

Daily Afflictions: The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe

Andrew Boyd (born 1962 in New York City) is a United States author, humorist and veteran of creative campaigns for social change.

He co-founded Agit-Pop Communications, an award-winning “subvertising” agency, as well as the netroots social justice movement The Other 98%.

He’s the author of four books: Beautiful Trouble, Daily Afflictions, Life’s Little Deconstruction Book and the Activist Cookbook, and the forthcoming I Want a Better Catastrophe: Hope, Hopelessness and Climate Reality. He lives in New York City.